In the age of technology, how fun is it to open your mailbox and see that the mailman delivered you something the good-old snail mail way that isn’t a bill? With your wedding – engagement announcements, save-the-dates, and invitations give your guests a little taste of what’s to come. Each thoughtfully put together with vintage stamps & a handwritten calligraphy address.
But how do you know when the right time is to send all of these out? I had this same question and more cross my mind as well, especially since we’re having two weddings. But, worry not, here’s a timeline from the experts of when to mail things out and notify your guests.
Traditional Wedding and Save-the-Dates Timeline
Two years out + — Engagement Announcements
Engagement Announcements are a wonderful way to let everyone know your big news, especially if you’re not planning on getting married for 2+ years. The nice thing about these is that you don’t need to have any decisions made yet – no venue, no date needed – just a picture of you and your fiancé sharing your love (and new bling 💍 ).
8-10 months out — Save-the-Dates
With these unprecedented times, the sooner you lock in your date with your guests the better! Save-the-Dates make your wedding date official and are a great reminder on the fridge to friends & family that they are already booked your weekend and can make travel plans other decisions around it.
4-6 months out — Destination Wedding Invitations
As a courtesy, destination wedding invitations should be mailed out earlier than your typical invitations. Guests need to book international flights, hotels, and make arrangements for babysitters – so notice is very important.
2-3 months out — Local Wedding Invitations
Why so close to the wedding?! This gives me so much anxiety, but apparently it is the etiquette to mail invitations out 8 weeks before your wedding so guests have a better idea if they are a definite – yes or no. It does make sense in the grand scheme of things because making a commitment two months out means guests are less likely to waver & your numbers will be more exact.
Your Wedding Day!
Remember a card box on your big day & to catalog any gifts received, this will be helpful later.
1-3 months after the wedding — Thank You Cards
Last but not least, a handwritten thank you to all of the guests in attendance – whether they gave a gift or not – is the appropriate etiquette. In addition, any guest who could not make it but sent a gift, your wedding planner and all vendors, and anyone who was not invited but gave a gift it is also necessary to send a thank you.
SAVE-THE-DATES
The Minted Story
Nick and I used Minted to design our announcements and are so happy with how they turned out! Minted makes what could be an overwhelming task simple and stress-free. They have a huge variety of templates, fonts, and colors to make sure you end up with a card you can’t wait to send out to family and friends.
Minted was founded in 2008 by the powerful Mariam Naficy, an early trailblazer of the e-commerce. I like using Minted because of its variety of products but even more so, I love supporting strong women-led companies and the independent artists whose designs are sold on the website.
ENGAGEMENT ANNOUNCEMENTS
Our Engagement Announcements
There really are no set rules when it comes to your wedding! Since Nick & I are planning two weddings we didn’t feel it was appropriate to send traditional Save-the-Dates. With two wedding dates and most guests planning on attending only our local Ohio ceremony, we didn’t want anyone to feel left out if the Save-the-Date had our Lake Como, Italy details.
So what did we mail out instead of Save-the-Dates?
We mailed out Engagement Announcements from Minted to all of our loved ones and I’m so happy with how they turned out. Choosing Engagement Announcements feels like we are making a declaration and stating facts like in a newspaper for all to read, instead of Save-the-Dates which felt like we might be excluding people who might be attending one ceremony and not the other. If you are having two weddings as well, here is what we wrote on our Announcements if you need a little inspiration:
“Fulfilling their dreams as a couple, Nick & Caila will have an intimate ceremony in Lake Como, Italy on May 29,2021 as well as a local ceremony & reception in Chagrin Falls, Ohio on July 17, 2021. Invitations to follow.”
I can’t tell you how big of a relief it was to put those last few stamps on our finished Minted announcements. So much love goes into these that it felt like I was protecting a baby while carrying them to the post office. No matter how yours turn out, your family and friends are going to light up knowing they’re a part of your special day. So, even if you don’t follow the perfect timeline, it’s okay! Take a deep breath and remember that what really matters is that you’re marrying that love of your life✨
Love reading wedding content? Check out these other blog posts below:
6 Tips for Picture Perfect Engagement Photos
How I asked my Bridesmaids 💍 Wedding Bridal Party Proposal Boxes
Engagement Dos & Don’ts – The 10 things I wish I knew after he put a ring on it! 💍
I recently listened to the podcast where you were asked why you were going to have two weddings. You said that some family members asked you “why are you forcing us to take a vacation?”
I was LIVID, first of all nobody is “forcing” them to anything, either they decide to go or not to go, second, if they are complaining about it DEFINITELY they should not be attending, third, who thinks is a burden to visit Europe and attend a wedding there??
After comments like that you can bet I would not be spending money feeding them and giving them free drinks on a second wedding (because that’s their main goal, just free food and drinks that won’t be available to them on a destination wedding).
This post is not to trying to convince you to cancel your second wedding, I know you’ll still have it and I can’t wait for those red dress pictures, this post is to help you realize that there are signs in life that tell you some people should not deserve your time (let alone your money) and it doesn’t matter if they are family members because they don’t care if you are. I bet in 10-15 years those same family members will still be as shitty as they are today and you won’t believe you even invited them to your wedding. Maybe they don’t look bad to you right now but throughout the next years they will show more and more of this type of behavior until you’ll be fed up with it.
They one who love you WILL move mountains to be there with you guys in Italy, the ones who really can’t go will truly feel awful that they can’t make it but will let you know they wish they could be there on a fairytale wedding in Italy. The crappy family members and “friends” will make you feel bad for having YOUR wedding wherever you want to have it.
At the end of the day is YOUR wedding, not theirs, if you want to have it the way you want it it’s your problem, if they don’t like it they can organize their own.
Distance yourself from those people, don’t go out of your way to please them because you will find out in the future they still didn’t thank you, they still didn’t care and you will end up realizing it was not worth your time and money.
Because real friends and family members will be the ones trying to please you, not the other way around.
Author
Hi Juan — aw thank you for your thoughts and support! I was a little bummed when hearing that feedback, for sure. It’s hard to hear that when you’re so excited and see a specific vision in your head. I totally understood that it was a big ask, having people take time off work, leave their daily lives, and also pay to travel. But it’s true, no one is being forced and that is why we decided to have a local, Ohio wedding in addition so that those who couldn’t attend Italy, for whatever reason, would still be able to celebrate with us an be a part of our special day. Unfortunately, since this post, we have decided it’s best for us to cancel both of these weddings (Italy and Ohio) and kind of start anew. While I’m sad I won’t have my European moment with the red dress, I’m super excited for what’s to come!!