love & the city

Navigating Dating In a World of D*ck Picks & Mating Apps

I know I said the “D” word 🙈, but it had to be done. Dating isn’t what it used to be, but thank’s to Match’s #SinglesInAmerica study – special guests Dr. Helen Fisher and Stassi Schroeder chat with me about the need-to-know tips for navigating the game of love in 2017

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“The best thing you could do this Valentine’s Day, skip the flowers, just pull out your cell phone in front of them and turn it off… not on vibrate.. off! ”

— Dr. Helen Fisher

Singles in America,

This one’s for you! So… you know I LOVE talking about LOVE… whether on The Bachelor or sitting next to someone on the subway. So when Match approached me to host a chat about their Singles In America study – it was a quick swipe right 😉

Just in time for Valentine’s Day I had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Helen Fisher, the Chief Scientific Advisor to Match, and the unfiltered Vanderpump Rules TV personality and podcast host Stassi Schroeder. I have to admit I was a little nervous at first, because I am a HUGE fan of Helen’s work/book/Ted Talk, but things heat up 2.5-min into our Match Facebook Live chat that you can WATCH HERE – thanks to Mevo!

p.s. if you’re short of time – check out my favorite moment 19 minutes into the chat where I share why, this year, my goal is to initiate more conversations with men instead of waiting on them… & why Stassi loves to chase 😉

For those of you that nerd out about love like me, wanted to share a highlight reel of some of the juiciest findings from the study… you never know, they might just help you find your match.

D*CK PICS

4 min into chat

46.5% of Millennial Men admit to sending one 🙈
40% of those men sent one without being asked
90% of women say they have no interest in receiving one

I was SHOCKED to hear the first statistic – just feels like such a high number, right? In our chat Helen mentioned the reason men send them is in hopes of receiving a pic in return, but… I think those men will be waiting a longgg time.

SIGNIFICANT MOMENTS IN DATING

9 min 30 sec into chat

87% of singles say caring for you when you’re sick is an important indicator of a meaningful relationship
Millennial men are 24% more likely than women to say finding a relationship was a top priority for them – great add by Dr. Fisher! Millennial men are looking for those significant moments <3

We all have that moment where we ask ourselves… Is this even going anywhere? or what are we? Indicators of a meaningful relationship can be breadcrumbs to ease our heart from asking those questions too soon. An introduction to someone important to you & planning a trip can be big steps for some, but Stassi mentioned saying “I love you” is a meaningful moment to her… we are all different. What is an important indicator to you? Would love to hear in the comment section.

PHONE ETTIQUETTE

14 min into chat

57% of singles are upset if you read the occasional text during a date – Love that Stassi affirms with an, “I would NEVER!”
41% of singles think it is rude if you take your phone with you to the bathroom or outside
45% of singles would consider it a turn on if you visibly turn your phone off during a date

THE #GIRLBOSS

18 min into chat

#1 Turn on for men this year? Female entrepreneurship 38%
Data also uncovered that Feminists make great dates! 41% more likely to pick the place for a first date & 27% more likely to send a message first after a good first date

Love how fired up Dr. Fisher is about this topic & if there is one moment in the chat I could recommend it would be this one! Our panel takes it to a personal level and even reveal why feminists make great first dates. p.s. Stassi considers herself a feminist!

BINGE WATCHING

23 min into chat

Millennials are 270% more likely than other generations to be turned on by someone who is binge watching the same TV shows

Panel’s choice of a sexy show to binge watch together: Game of Thrones

PAYING THE CHECK

26 min into chat

71% of men find it attractive when a woman offers to split the bill

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“I don’t offer to pay the check on the first date. I want to, but I won’t.”

— Stassi Schroeder

Q & A

30 min into chat

Dr. Fisher – what is the most surprising thing about men that you learned in this year’s study?

“Men fall in love much more often then women do. Men fall in love faster then women do, more often. They want to tell friends and family sooner, want to move in sooner. This year we asked the question, ‘How many times have you been ‘really’ in love in your life?’ and men said 3.3 times and women said 2.3 times.” – Dr. Helen Fisher

What are signs from a man that a relationship has potential?

“That he calls, remembers what you talked about last night, shows up on time, well dressed… it’s simple but not easy” – Dr. Helen Fisher

Do you think dating apps have made dating worse?

“I would say yes, absolutely yes. There’s so many things that I didn’t realize. Now that it’s 2017, I’m like wait… there’s Instagram where you have to focus on if someone likes your photos or likes your Facebook and likes this and if they stop liking it or look at your snapchat. I’m like, ‘what the f*ck – this is way too confusing.’ When I go on a date with someone and I look who they are following and if it’s a bunch of porn stars… I think, ‘you’re a wierdo.’ It all just takes up too much of my time.” – Stassi Schroeder

Thank you so much for joining the #SinglesInAmerica conversation with Match & Mevo – to learn more go to SinglesInAmerica.com. Please feel free to comment below or on Instagram about your favorite finds or new dating do’s – would love to hear & I’ll comment back!

Happy Valentine’s Day!